Drawing people out

The following is an excerpt, taken with permission, from Sam Kaner’s book: Facilitator’s Guide to Participatory Decision-Making (New Society Publishers, 1996).

Why

How

Drawing People out is a way of supporting people to take the next step in clarifying and refining their ideas. It sends the speaker this message, “I’m with you; I understand you so far. Now tell me a little more.”- Drawing people out is particularly useful in two circumstances: 1) when someone is having difficulty clarifying an idea; 2) when someone thinks s/he is being clear, but the thought is actually vague or confusing to the listener.
Drawing people out send the message, “Take your time and get your idea all the way out.”
When deciding whether to draw someone out, ask yourself this question: “Do I think I understand the core of what s/he is trying to say?” If the answer is “no,” then draw the speaker out.

Drawing people out is most effectively used along with paraphrasing, not instead of paraphrasing. Example: The speaker says, “I think it’s really fair to say that most people are pretty uncomfortable with change.” The listener paraphrases, (e.g., “So it sounds like you’re saying that change is hard for most people.”) Then the listener asks, “can you give me an example of what you mean?”
The most basic technique of drawing people out is to paraphrase the speaker’s statement, then ask open-ended, nondirective questions. Examples: “Can you say more about that?” or “What do you mean by…?” or “How so?”
Here is a less common method that also works well. First, paraphrase the speaker’s statement, then use connectors such as, “So…” or “And…” Example: “You’re saying to wait six more weeks before we sign the contract because…”